Goodbye My Genji

Writer's note: In case you are wondering, yes...it's true. I've still got writer's block. After following Danny's advice from my Writer's Block blog, I listened to some music to unblock myself. But, with all these Christmas songs in my head, all I can think of is that Santa is a Ninja, and what kind of cookies he'd want by the fireplace this year. More on that later. Here's my cop out - I'm going to post a short story that I've written about Lady Blue. Enjoy!!!

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Goodbye My Genji
copyright 2007 by Yen Verhoeven

Genji sat straight up on his cot, unable to sleep. His ears straining for a sound, a noise… something in the dark… hoping…hoping…

……for her.

“Are you there?” He whispered into the shadows, and waited…

Moments later, his nose caught the heady scent of sandalwood on the breeze, and he smiled. He licked his dry, parched lips, and sighed.

“Lady Blue, you have come again to visit me. I get so lonely when you do not visit, my Lady. Tonight… “ His shaky withered hand reaches over to grab pen and paper, bringing it to rest on the floor between his bony bare feet.

“They gave me rice paper! Rice paper…for….for you!” The white sightless eyes beamed in pride from his old, wrinkled face. He waited… wondering, like he did so many times before, whether this was only a dream… or a nightmare.

“Genji…” a soft lilting voice that reminded him of a lover’s sigh. Genji felt cool, delicate fingers caress his face, and he heard the familiar rustle of fine gowns as she settled herself in front of him. Her warm breath tickles his ear and neck. The whisper of her seductive voice fills him with anticipation.

“I have another story for you, Genji-chan. One for my pillow-book. You will write this for me, yes?”

Genji nods enthusiastically. “I am ready, my Lady.” He hears the rustle of silk and the tinkling of ornamental bells as his Lady Blue bows to him, signaling that she was about to begin. She tells him of another adventure from lands far away, and in provinces close by. Genji writes. He does not know how he does this…but his words are captured in his mind’s eye, and they appear on the paper, pausing only occasionally to ask her questions to clarify, or slow down her narration so that he can write the details.

Tonight, Lady Blue tells him about a minor battle between two lords, and how she had turned the tides. It was a short piece. Normally, stories took most of the evening. But in this case, it took less than two hours to write down. When she had finished speaking, Genji looks up from his papers.

“Is that all, my Lady?” Genji’s eyebrows creased as he looked up to her with his milky, unfocused eyes. He was afraid she would go. He didn’t want her to go. Otherwise, he would be alone again….with his mind.

“No. I have one more thing, Genji.” He heard her stand up… the whisper of a gown as it slid off the curves of an impossibly perfect body, and onto the floor. His ears strain to hear more, and he jumps when he feels her delicate fingers on his lips.

“Genji-chan, tonight is the last night I will visit you.”

The words are a cold shock to his body. He has had regular visits from Lady Blue. Between the solitude in his cell, memories of her voice...the sounds of her…the smell of her… were the only things that gave him a reprieve. And now that too, would be taken away from him. A strangled sob catches in his throat.

“Nooo….!” He cries out. His hand, without thinking, reaches out in protest…and touches incredibly soft skin. “Please…do not leave me here! Please?” He begs as she grabs his hand and brings it to her face.

“No, Genji…I cannot.” She turns her head to softly kiss the palm of his hand, bringing his fingers up to touch her forehead…her shapely eyebrows… closing her eyes as his fingers explore her face, skimming her features. Genji speaks in hushed awe.

“…My Lady… you are so…beautiful!” Tears pour down his face as she allows him to touch. He burns every detail of her into his mind, vowing never to forget; and yet….

She leans in to whisper to him again. “Genji, my love…. Paint me a picture. Please? A picture…of me?” Her kiss catches him by surprise as cool lips brush against his mouth…the taste of her reminding him of orchids and morning dew…of freedom. He takes in a deep breath… a shaken sigh as she wraps her slender arms around him and consumes him in a blur of distorted thoughts and memories….

Genji stirs from his cot…still feeling the echo of her warm body imprinted on his skin. Her scent is everywhere. It penetrates every pore of his body, and brings him peace. He lays still, listening to the sound of her putting on her clothes.

“Remember, Genji. Remember what you must do when you finish.” She touches his lips once more, kissing him lightly. “Goodbye, my Genji…” And she was gone.

The morning guard opened Genji’s cell to give him his breakfast…and dropped his plate. The scent of blood and bile made him fall to his knees, gagging and retching before he gathered the strength to run and get the others. As soldiers filled the room, they looked in shocked horror and pity. Poor crazy Genji….they thought. The walls were covered from ceiling to floor with drawings, kanji, strange symbols and markings done in blood and feces. Many of these were old. They had tried to keep him from hurting himself by giving him brushes and paper. It hadn’t worked. At night, they even bound him in rope. But for some reason, he always managed to free himself by dawn.

Fresh markings covered the walls, punctuated with tatters of skin, bits of nail and hair where he had bitten and flayed himself. What was left of him was hanging from the ceiling by the sash of his kimono.

Several hours later, when they removed the body and cleaned the cell, a maid found the book. It was tucked lovingly and carefully into the cotton of his pillow and wrapped with scraps of cloth…. Save for the smears of blood, it was written in perfect calligraphy…a reminder of when Genji was the emperor’s personal scribe. On the cover, painted in blood and water, was his last work.